Really Zoe Saldana....I Mean Really?

After a lusty night of True Blood (praise God for cable and naked men-since I'm not getting any.  And thank you Lord for TIVO that allows me to rewind, slow mo and pretend insert my name into sexy actors mouths...) and reading a really good book that is scaring the bejesus out of me, I just have to say, I keep seeing this crapfest called Columbiana with Zoe Saldana.

Now, let me just give you a little history.  Ms. Saldana is Dominicana.  So, uh, yeah, she's playing a Columbiana out for revenge on some bad guys that killed her family.  Expect to see her scrawny ass walking around in a bra and panties, hair flying, bad ass tattoos and watch her carry guns that have enough recoil to break her bony little arms.  But I digress from my bitchiness..

What we are talking about here is the Columbians.  A few years ago, hell maybe last year, I read an article in the Washington Post about Black Columbians.  Oh, you didn't know they existed?  Hell, nobody does, why? Because they are what I refer to as "the hidden people".  It's like well we don't want to see them, so let's put them in shanty town, shitty little houses and make like they don't exist. Eventually, we will kill them off or breed them with enough lighter skinned Columbians they will assimilate.  So, my question is how is this chick gonna play a Columbiana when the country won't acknowledge their existence, nor help them?  Why couldn't it be called "Bad Ass Dominicana".  It's like me playing a Brazilian. Yeah, I got the accent down and stuff, and I could probably pass, but would I really want to do it?

What a messed up world we live in where crap like this is produced.  And I'm sure at one point these words will come out of her mouth, "It was a cathartic experience because I got to embrace my Dominican heritage, while learning about Columbian heritage as well."  Another thing, why is her dad in the previews light skinned?  I mean, who am I to say with my Heinz 57 background?  My nieces and nephews run all kinds of rainbow coalition colors and my kids are all biracial, so I'm just completing the circle of life.  But I will tell you this, if they ask me about themselves, I would tell them to be proud of who they are and not to pretend to be who they want or what is accepted.

Keep Getting Knocked Down

Did you ever have a day or a week in which you feel like you just keep getting knocked down and it's like I can not get back up. Each time I stand, it feels like someone is pushing me down. So, you figure, I should just stay down.  That has been my life since March.  Since I turned 40, my life has been a crap shoot.  Illustrated with the following craptastic events:

1. I get hired for a job and fired before I even begin.  I spent a day there, taking notes at a meeting and they call me and tell me never come back.  No explanation, no excuse, no letter (like they promised) just zilch.
2. I actually had to ask an organization to pay my rent for two (now maybe 3 months) because my unemployment won't cover it.
3. I worked with a temp agency and I had to leave the assignment because of a death in the family.  Now I don't even want to get in touch with them to see if they want me back because they lost a big contract.
4. I am on more drugs now than I ever was in my life.  It's like I just don't even care, but I take them and I still get sick after being told I wouldn't.

So, what's a girl to do-aside from sitting on the floor and watching episode after episode of Snapped or the History International Channel?

1. I signed up with a new temp agency that promises to get me more than what I was making before, which is awesome!
2. I signed up for a new job locator service that delivers results to my inbox daily. I can save them and go back and apply for jobs.
3. I think I have a pretty good support network that I need to use a bit more.
4. I have some networks I haven't tapped into yet.

It's like this, I need to help myself more, instead of just sitting around waiting.  It's hard because I like summer, I being home with little one and just chilling.  I just need to recognize that I need to be a bit more proactive.

I will just end this brief synopsis with this:

"I get knocked down, but I get up again, you're never gonna keep me down.."